Home » Fear, Jealousy And Selfishness

After thinking about  Bruce Horst's article entitled, "Where are the Articles About Being a Servant?"and his specific words of "What is the ratio of the number of passages in the New Testament of the Bible which command Christians to love one another?" I thought about the sad situation in our world. Why don't we love one another? So many of us are filled with different types of fear, maybe leftover from childhood. We don't believe we are good enough or up to par with the next person. We look in the mirror, and don't see what everyone else sees when they look at us. We see ugliness, and weight issues, and acne, and oily hair. This kind of attitude about ourselves, tends to keep us private and apart from others. We can't love others if we don't know any. There are books, or therapy open to those who wish to learn how to turn their shyness around to strength and altruism. Before they know it, they are doing nice things for friends and teachers and family, and being there for others out of a love and concern for those they meet along their journey.

Jealousy stems from fear, and a very low self confidence. Jealous people want what they have, as well as what others' possess. They're never happy for anyone's good fortune, because it isn't theirs. They can't love anyone because they don't know how to love themselves. These types of people can also get help through reading or therapy. Once they learn where their harmful attitude is coming from, and learn skills to change those feelings, they, too, can travel on their road with love in their hearts for all they meet.

Selfishness is the epitome of not knowing what love really is. A selfish person can't know love, or concern for another. They don't love themselves, even if they think they adore their own being. Love doesn't want something another has, love doesn't take from others, love doesn't make sure you have the best, and give what's left to the rest. Love doesn't envy. Love is happy for another who gets a good job or buys a new home or gets a nice car. Once again, selfishness can be eradicated from your life if you read self help books or go for therapy. It doesn't have to be a permanent way of life. and once you get to the bottom of your selfishness, you'll feel much better, and will be more loving to those surrounding you.

People need to open up their minds. just because one believes something, doesn't necessarily mean it's so. With an open mind, you can converse with others calmly, and just maybe change your opinion. When you loosen up your guard, you may find yourself picking up a small gift for a co worker, simply because she likes daisies, and they had some at the A & P. Fearful, jealous, selfish people don't do that. You could break away from your old mold and increase your zest and excitement for life. I meet so many different types of people when I go out, because I talk to anyone who will talk to me. I tell the young boy that I think his t shirt is cool, I hold the door open for the next person, I kid with the grocery checkout person, I have even had conversations with people in the aisle.

I tell someone passing me that I like their coat, a smile is the next thing I see, and they like the compliment. I have talked, without exaggeration or my kids consent, yeah, right, to every single one of their friends that has ever come in this house, and there were many. Three teens growing up, with 5 or 10 friends each for years. My kids would be mortified, but one of their friends would be standing at my computer telling me whatever was on their mind. I've helped these kids when they didn't feel comfortable going to their own parents. Why? Because they are close minded, and the kids know I am open minded.

My one son just got dreads. Hate em. They look ridiculous. He loves them. So what do I do? I tell him they're not my thing, but if they make him happy, I'm glad. It's just hair. When he gets tired of them, he'll cut them off. Other parents forbid it. Is it out of selfishness, that they will be embarrassed? I'm not embarrassed of my son, I just know he looks different, and that he's had a hard time and needs something to make him stand out and have people tell him they're cool. When he develops his own self confidence, he may not need them, or he may have them for the rest of his life, who cares? Plenty of people, but not me. My daughter had them at one time, and they're gone now, but she was also ostracized.

If we could be open minded, we could open ourselves up to so many more happy thoughts, memories, and experiences. For example, I'm walking into our A & P, and there is a man walking next to me, who happens to be black, and we talked for a few minutes on our way in, and then he said, "I know you". "What?" "Yup, my friend has the same car as you, and everytime I think it's him, I see you." And he started laughing. I said that was weird, we went our separate ways, and it was nice. Caring. Altruistic, and loving, and no room for judgment on either of our parts.

We need to be aware that we have the power to improve someone's day. Sending a nice picture in an email, calling someone when they're lonely, inviting someone to your home for lunch. I have great conversations with the operators when I have to call JCP & L, or Verizon, or anywhere. I just start being nice to them, they are nice to me, and we talk a little. When people realize that we are all brothers and sisters in Christ, maybe people will loosen up a bit. I know my kids are aware, but then again, I'm their mother, and taught them about the zero difference between different nationalities. My daughter lives with a Filipino, her friend is Black, and she has never thought of a difference.

If I'm running in a store while my partner waits outside, or vice versa, we have to warn the other one not to talk to anybody! Or we'll be waiting for a long time. I took 10 minutes one time just to help an older woman decide what cleaner to buy. We all need to open our minds. Throw out the old taboos, and start with a smart mind that tells you instinctually that we are all the same on this Earth, and the nicer we are to each other, and the more people we love, the happier we will be, and our Lord will be just as happy, and proud. No caring, compassionate, enlightened, and loving God is going to take the time to create a Universe in which His beloved children fight, and harm, and kill. I am sure that was not His intent.

 

We need to find out about ourselves in whatever way we feel comfortable, and then, let go. Let your instincts be loving and caring, respectful, honest and humble. Let your spirits rise because you did something nice for somebody, for no other reason than you wanted to. Stop at the Catholic Church and light a candle (or turn a switch) for someone. They don't have to be Catholic. Smile when you approach someone, not frown until you get to know them better. If you frown, chances are you won't get to know them at all. Rid yourself of fear, jealousy, selfishness, and anger, and open your closed mind. Be aware that you are the delegate for God, and do your job.