There Is A Difference In Knowing
Posted: Tuesday, February 24, 2009
by Susan Thom
Have you ever watched babies play? I'm sure you have. Sometimes, one will bump the other in the heard by accident, and there will be a little crying, a little sniffling, and with some positive reinforcement, they'll be back to playing in no time. On occasion, though, there may be one baby who seems to deliberately try to hurt the other babies. They use their toys to hit with, their hands to pinch, their mouth's to bite, and you wonder why an innocent child would do such things. Maybe because they aren't so innocent.
There is either innocence, or a lack of knowledge in some, and mistakes are made, with no foundation on maliciousness. Sometimes, we just don't know any better at the time. Chances are, when a friend offers to go to the grill and put some burgers on, and smashes into our sliding door, cracking it, they had no malice of intent. It was simply an accident. However, if a friend comes over drunk, and angry, and smashes our TV with a poker from the fireplace, it would appear he had done something destructive on purpose.
Both the TV and the sliding door are destroyed, but who do we get more angry with, the neighbor who accidentally crashed into our door? Or the friend who ruined our means of entertainment with the vindictiveness and malice to do so on purpose? Is it less annoying to clean up a little one's spilled juice all over the floor, when it was accidentally knocked over? Or does it upset us more when we watch that child throw the cup across the kitchen, because they want a cookie instead, and all of it's contents sprays everywhere we now have to clean?
The intentional and deliberate hurting of others is different than hurting someone's feelings because we told them their lipstick was the wrong color. Unless we did so to hurt them. As I heard Maya Angelou say, " We do what we know how to do, and when we know better, we do better." I took that saying to heart, and knew that my mistakes had never been done to purposely hurt another, even though I may have done so. By thinking more fluently, not being as impulsive, and being more patient, life settles down.
It's not as hard to breathe or handle obstacles that come our way. Spite and vindictiveness are not character traits I want to surface. There is a difference in knowing. If we know what we are about to do is wrong, but we go ahead and do it anyway, we will pay the price, whatever God deems that to be. And I also believe that if we live our lives, filling them with compassion, nurturing, fairness and honesty, we will be rewarded. It may take a while, but it will happen. God knows what is in our hearts, minds, and souls, and He always knows what our intentions are. I think we forget about that most of the time.
We may be able to hide in a broom closet from someone we don't want to see, but we can't hide in a broom closet from God. He knows what we are thinking and feeling, and with what intent our actions are based. So many crimes would be obsolete, if every man and woman knew the repercussions of their actions. Not only the physical restraints of jail, if they are caught, but the blemish they are putting on their soul for doing something they knew wasn't right. There are many different perceptions in life, but doing wrong or harm to another, isn't a perception, and if we caused that person to be hurt, we are at fault, and the day will come when we will get to experience our own price to pay. The question I ask myself is "What is my intent for wanting to do this?"
If we are honest with ourselves, we can usually figure out if we want to help or hurt someone, or possibly make ourselves look good. Is the present we pick up of a bunny statue because our friend loves bunnies? Are we doing so to make our friend happy, or do we want the praise and adulation we know our friend will provide? Do we volunteer at the school because we really want to help, or so we don't look bad to the other mothers? Do we return someone's wallet because it's the right thing to do, or because we hope there is a nice reward?
Doing things for the right reason does matter. Doing things for the wrong reasons matters. It depends on how we want to feel about ourselves. Do we have a strong, honest conscience? Does it help to keep us in line? Or are we filled with greed and revenge, and take it out on others in the name of fair play? If this is the case, then we aren't thinking or acting in the way we should. It's never too late to evaluate our reasons and intentions, and vow to make improvements where we know we need them. Once we do so, we are responsible for our thoughts and behavior. It's up to us to take that responsibility seriously. There is a difference in knowing.
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Top-level comments on this article: (6 total)Sue, this is outstanding. I liked the quote from Maya Angelou. This message was a very good reminder for us to guard our hearts. For there is a difference in knowing. We must answer for our actions. Thank you for all the analogies used to clearly demonstrate what you've written and have obviously learned. My best, Avis.Please log in to respond to this comment.hi avis,good little chat we had on the internet, huh?it seems we both got a lot out of it.thank you for reading, and inspiring,always,suePlease log in to respond to this comment.
Good job, Sue. I taught my kids that you do the right thing because it is the right thing to do.Please log in to respond to this comment.hi ken,so did i, and for the most part, i think it was instilled in them, which keeps them on the respectful and honest side.the conscience was what i was after, for i know from my own experience that if we have an honest conscience, right will always be more evident than wrong.thank you for reading, and being a loyal fan,my best regards,suePlease log in to respond to this comment.
Hi Sue, great job. Many things to consider. Motive and purpose is the bottom line. Hugs, tPlease log in to respond to this comment.hi t,thanks for stopping by.and yes, motive is very important. if we just took the time to say to ourselves, before doing something we may regret, "Why am i going to do this?" if the motives are bad, and we can stop ourselves, we are on the road to recovery.my best regards,suePlease log in to respond to this comment.
Great article, which we should all take to heart. For most of us who can reason, what you have said makes sense and is so logical, unfortunately we also have to have a conscience in order to understand and accept what you have said. The Bible says that some have seared their conscience. How can we make such a person understand the consequences of their actions? There's a lot to think about in this article.Please log in to respond to this comment.
hi David,i think to have a good conscience, one must think of others as well as themselves, and believe in equality for all. if we feed our consciences to think it's okay to take the bigger slice of cake or the last 2 donuts, because we deserve it, therefore implying others don't, i think we then need to get in touch with our spirit and understand that we are all created equal, and the more we help each other, the more positive strength we gain.thank you for reading and responding,i appreciate it,best regards,suePlease log in to respond to this comment.
Susan,That was a homerun! Really makes one think - deep, deep inside. Great article.Thank you for sharing great and honest thought!NancyPlease log in to respond to this comment.hi nancy,i appreciate your time and comments.life is so filled with lessons, and if we take the time time to learn them, our lives run so much more smoothly, and with so much more purpose.hard work, but worth it.thanks for reading and commenting, i do appreciate it,my best regards,suePlease log in to respond to this comment.
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