My Mom Was A Realist, My Dad An Ex Marine, So Where Does That Leave Me
Posted: Saturday, June 27, 2009
by Susan Thom
My mom was a realist. Maybe being a nurse had affected her in a way that she wasn't going to "baby" her babies. My father was an ex marine and wouldn't accept, "I can't, or I don't want to." We were innocent kids, content to play and interact among the 4 of us. If we got hurt, my mom fixed us up, and it was back out to play. Crying and carrying on wasn't acceptable, and we became quite strong individuals.
Dinner was at 6, and we were to be there, not 6:15, or 6:30 when the kickball game was over, but 6 on the dot. We didn't have a choice what to eat, we were to eat whatever was on our plate. The 4 of us kids did not leave that kitchen until all was cleaned up, and then we could return to our game. Luckily, the kids we played with ate dinner at 6 as well. At 8, we were called in, and we knew it was to our definite advantage to be in the house. Homework was to be done, baths taken, and bedtime adhered to.
Life went on like this until we became adults and moved out on our own. It wasn't until we "hit the streets" so to speak, that we realized how much our parents had prepared us for a world we only read about. The ease of grammar school and high school became apparent as we all got jobs to support ourselves. Trying to balance a huge oval silver tray filled with hot plates of food was much easier, when the determination and stubbornness we had learned, came into play.
In order to get a paycheck, we did many things, and we were considerate enough to give 2 weeks notice before starting another job. We all worked for about 10 years before we married and had kids of our own. We knew how to manage our money, pay our rent and utilities, buy our groceries, car and insurance, and get along with our coworkers and bosses. We were out in the world, and the safety of our home was a thing of the past, but a memory I still hold today.
The world we live in now is filled with happiness, pain, confusion, frustration, anger, peaceful moments, hope, love, and despair. All entwined within each other, depending on the moment and the circumstance, and the people involved. Nerves of steal come in handy, but once the problem has passed, those nerves can collapse, and we may need a break from the chaos of life. However, maintaining a good background of how to think, act, and react, helps immensely.
Panic is avoided when you grow up self sufficient and strong. I have had to go through much on my own to get where I am today, and I am thankful to my parents for having the knowledge to prepare me. They are both in a better place now, but I still feel their presence and prodding to do the next right thing. It may not be easy, but their strength pushes me forward, while growing up, and now as spiritual beings. They have held me up when I wanted to fall, and kept me smart when I wanted to do something stupid.
I have had 3 kids naturally (now, there's a play on words-I felt nothing natural about it.) I have raised these 3 kids to adulthood, gone through years of Hell for many reasons, a divorce, a diagnosis of crohn's, depression, and post traumatic stress, and I just keep on going. I have not only had physical and emotional problems, but outside interference, and I'm here, in my home, where I belong, writing my articles. I thank my parents for teaching me to be strong and competent and able to achieve the goals I set up for myself.
I showered my kids with affection, but I also passed on to them all my parents gave to me. We must feel the strength our faith provides, and the power to carry out all that life brings our way. It's not easy, of course, but with a solid upbringing in the things that matter, we can put one foot in front of the other and do what we need to do.
We can stand up for ourselves, we can deal with life's upsets, and continue on in the best way possible, having learned from our adversity, and mom and dad!
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Top-level comments on this article: (2 total)I, also had parents who prepped me for this world, though at times, my mom was a little overprotective. Thanks for bringing back some memories.Please log in to respond to this comment.
hi lorrie,this is a difficult world in which to shoo our kids into. hopefully, we can prepare them the best we can. thanks for reading and commenting,my best to you,suePlease log in to respond to this comment.
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